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It’s OK to Say NO

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It’s OK to Say NO
978-1-886249-29-5 • WindRiver Publishing • Donald Smith • Trade paperback • NOV 2005 • 140pp • $9.95 • Buy Direct $7.95Originally published by WindRiver Publishing

Everybody knows someone who always gives money to their always-needy brother or never seems to find time for his or her self and we all know someone who would be much happier if they could just work up the nerve to tell a dead-beat boyfriend or a nosey neighbor to go away. In his latest book, Don Smith tells us the frightening consequences if we don’t learn to say "no" and the happiness we can find if we do learn to say "no."

 
Author
Donald SmithDonald G. Smith is an advocate for the millions of people who suffer daily from the onslaught of moochers who want to take them for every dime in their pockets, usurp every second of their lives, and strain every ounce of their sanity. His goal is to help people learn that with a little practice, they can be free of these leeches and live happier lives.

More than twenty years of work as an editor and editorial supervisor in the aerospace industry have taught Don that having the strength to choose how you live can greatly enhance your quality of life. He has shared his experiences on many radio talk shows and through the messages of his books: How to Cure Yourself of Positive Thinking, The Joy of Negative Thinking, And They Also Kick You When You're Down

Interview

Veteran writer Donald Smith's unusual philosophy sprung from a radio broadcast he heard in the 1970s. The broadcast featured the idea of "positive thinking," one that Smith has spent his career as an author shunning.

The success of his slew of books - seven now - has led to national tours to include cities like New York, Miami, Baltimore, Cleveland, Chicago, Minneapolis, Atlanta and San Francisco where he appeared on radio and television interviews including Larry King's radio show in Miami, just before King became famous nationwide.

Smith has also written for the Wall Street Journal, Reader's Digest, the San Francisco Examiner and the Chicago Tribune.

His latest book "It's OK to Say No" was published in November by WindRiver Publishing.

Smith's success as an author is obvious, but it hasn't always come easily.

Still, he got lucky in his initial search for publishers. His first book, "How to Cure Yourself of Positive Thinking" was picked up by the first agent he solicited and Pocketbooks published it in 1976.

"Then I knew I was a nonfiction writer," said Smith, who until then had tooled with all kinds of writing, from essays to screenplays.

The decision to be a writer came early to Smith. "It's all I've ever wanted to do," he said.

Smith spent more than 20 years as an editor and editorial supervisor in the aerospace industry. He later taught various English courses in the continuing education department at Allan Hancock College.

Smith lives his life according to the principles his books preach.

"Learn how to say the word 'no,'" he said, summarizing the point of his most recent book.

Smith's way of thinking has helped him throughout life, he says, especially to build up sales resistance. "You don't need to make excuses," he said, commenting how people often feel they need to have a reason why they don't want to buy something or participate in something.

So who should read Smith's books?

"Anybody putting up with something he doesn't have to," said Smith, who is surprisingly anything but negative.

"The world is good," he said, explaining his philosophy. "Happiness is nothing more than the absence of unhappiness. So if it's hurting you, harming you, holding you back, get rid of it."

His philosophy has likely helped him survive the often-cutthroat publishing industry.

His advice for aspiring writers? "Keep trying," said Smith. "Don't quit."

Smith doles such advice out on a monthly basis, serving as chairman of a local writer's support group that meets at noon on the second Tuesday of every month at Cafe Monet, 1555 S. Broadway, in Santa Maria. All meetings are open to public. Rather than a group that critiques one another's work, Smith's group is a marketing group that shares advice on how to get a work published.

Smith typically submits drafts of his books, not yet in final form, to many publishers before a deal is made. "Nothing is for sure," he said, recognizing that the business of publishing never becomes routine.

Smith has also penned articles that have been published in prominent newspapers nationwide. His first book lead to that endeavor.

A year after "How To Cure Yourself of Positive Thinking" was published, an editor from the Wall Street Journal phoned him and asked him to write for them. He has since had 22 articles published in the Wall Street Journal and had also had contributed articles appear in Reader's Digest, the San Francisco Examiner and the Chicago Tribune.

When submitting articles, Smith usually sends editors completed articles that spring from his own creative imagination. Infrequently he is given an assignment.

Now 30 years into his writing career, Smith has found a new struggle: macular degeneration, an eye disease caused by the deterioration of the central portion of the retina.

"I keep going," Smith said. "I won't let it be a problem."

He uses a magnifying glass and an optelic machine that enlarges newspaper print, letters and memos to help him read and a word processor with a lighted screen to help him type.

He stopped driving in 1996, which was perhaps the most troubling thing to come from the disease. Still, not driving doesn't interfere with his craft, especially since the post office and copy center are in walking distance to his home.

"You just don't let it stop you," said Smith.

Smith certainly won't. His next book is likely a few query letters away.

"There's always an idea in my head," Smith said. "I live in a world of ideas."

Emily Wells, Santa Maria Times; 21 Jan 2006
Endorsement
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The Problem Perennial

These are people, usually acquaintances, who regularly need your time, your money, or your shoulder to cry on, but never seem to give anything to you. They seem to forever need someone to complain to, or always need another dollar to get them by. The problem perennial represents the difference between responsibility and obligation and how we often confuse the two.

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Love and Marriage

The U.S. divorce rate has generally been at 50% of yearly marriages for decades. Many systemic reasons exist for this statistic (financial stress, infidelity, etc.). However, the foundation of this statistic is usually an individual.s inability to say .no. to what would otherwise be a bad relationship. Love and marriage represent the difference between emotion and the intellect and how we often let one insensibly override the other.

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Our Retirement Years

The Golden Years should be the period when we have the most leisure time and the greatest opportunity to enjoy the fruits of our lives. Unfortunately, they are also a time when people are set upon by children who made bad choices or, worse, con-men ready to take their money. Our retirement years represent the difference between selfishness and self-interest and how our early education often leads us to sacrifice personal needs because we believe them to be selfish.